(This was originally written years ago. I'd say 2006 or somewhere in that neighborhood. In my effort to collect as much scribbling as I can here, on this blog, I'm resurrecting it.)
Jack girded himself for Thanksgiving dinners much as he imagined soldiers did for battle. As he drove to his Mother's house in a cold, misty rain he saw the next few hours unfold in his mind. His thoughts drifted to young G.I.s, crammed into heaving boats, headed for the beaches of Normandy and their destiny. Briefly, he wondered if he wouldn't trade places with them if given half a chance.
Jack's old, reliable Volvo chugged along familiar streets lined with bare, leafless trees. The sky loomed grey and ominous, and he read the menacing clouds as a harbinger of things to come. He lit a cigarette and cracked the window, a blast of cold, wet air caressing his face. He turned up the radio and drove on with the resolute, dignified purpose of an inmate walking to the gas chamber. The only thing missing was a priest.
Jack pulled up to his mother's house and stopped, the car still idling. He stared at the well-lit structure, which felt both familiar and alien. A wisp of smoke curled from the chimney, swirling amongst the rain before disappearing into the ether forever. He envied the smoke, wishing he could disappear as easily. With a sigh he killed the engine, tossed his cigarette, and got out. His fate was sealed. It was best to accept it like a man.
He approached the door, and it swung open suddenly. His sister Margie burst onto the porch, all frantic energy and neurosis, a glass of wine clutched in her hand.
"It's about fucking time," she said, tossing her hair out of her face with a flip of her head.
"Nice to see you too, Margie," Jack said without a trace of emotion.
"Do you have a cigarette?" she asked, sticking her hand in his jacket pocket before he could answer. She pulled out the pack and lit one up in one fluid, seamless motion.
Margie was what you would call neurotic, and that was if you were being kind. She was a relentless, petite machine, constantly in motion and rarely silent. Her ability to speak without thinking was legendary, and this trait had alienated many in her frantic path through life. Despite this she was their mother's pet, a fact that annoyed Margie to no end. The one person in the world that she most desired to annoy was their mother, and the fact that she wasn't able to accomplish this crawled under her skin and festered.
"How is it in there?" Jack asked.
Margie exhaled dramatically, craning her neck skyward and expelling smoke in a loud, exaggerated burst. She tilted her wine glass in Jack's direction, smiling.
"Brother," she said, "you're going to need a few of these."
Jack entered the house behind Margie. He found out long ago that it was best to follow Margie into a room, as she tended to deflect attention away from him without any effort. As he had hoped, she didn't disappoint.
"Mother," Margie yelled, "where did you get this fucking wine? It is absolute shit, and I mean that with all sincerity."
The house smelled of food and the woodsy aroma of the burning fire. It was spotless, as usual. Jack was struck, as he always was, by how everything was the same. Every knick-knack was in the exact same place it had been twenty years ago. The walls were the same color. His mother even went so far as to buy identical pieces of furniture when the old ones wore out. If she couldn't get the same one, she got one that was as close as possible. In Sandra Spencer's home, change was an enemy to be staved off at all costs.
From the kitchen, two rooms away, the voice of Sandra Spencer resonated through the house.
"Well, Margie," Sandra said, her voice unnaturally even and calm, "if you don't like the wine why do you keep drinking it?"
Margie looked at Jack and rolled her eyes. A laugh escaped her that sounded more like a snort.
"Well, Mother," Margie yelled, louder this time, "if I don't drink it I'll have to make it through this dinner sober. If I did that, I'd have to kill myself."
"Margie," Sandra said in the same calm voice, "you really should have been an actress. I swear, you are so dramatic sometimes."
Margie polished off the rest of her wine in a swift gulp. Her jaw tensed, and she headed off in the direction of the kitchen, stomping her feet heavily on the polished wood floors.
Jack took off his coat and tossed it on a wooden chair in the corner. It was a chair Jack had always hated. It was old, and it looked incapable of supporting any weight whatsoever. He and Margie used to dare each other to sit on it. Not even Margie attempted it. As deep as her desire to inflame her mother, she knew that breaking a piece of furniture was the wrong way to go about it. The furniture was a touchy subject with Sandra Spencer, capable of inducing a variety of wrath neither sibling cared to bear the brunt of.
Jack's grandfather, Frank, sat on the sofa, staring at a football game on the television. He was Eighty-years-old and still sharp as a tack. Jack remembered him from his childhood as being funny and warm. Since Jack's grandmother died three years ago, Frank had changed. He now only talked when prodded, and seemed to just be playing out his string with a quiet patience.
"Hi, Grandpa Frank," Jack said, waving.
Frank raised his hand in a wave, never taking his eyes off the television screen. He then let his hand drop back to his side with an audible plop.
From the kitchen, Jack heard his mother's voice. It was the same tone she'd used with his sister, polite and largely without emotion.
"Is that Jack out there?" his mother asked.
Jack inhaled sharply, considering going outside for another cigarette. Instead, he headed toward the kitchen for a glass of wine.
Sunday, October 30, 2011
Wherein I Make an Unusual Analogy about Occupy Wall Street and America in General…
I feel like I should be out occupying something.
I mean, seriously. Look at me. Sitting here in front of this glowing box, sipping coffee and listening to the Velvet Underground while I tap-tap-tap out a blog post in relative comfort. I think I may be part of the problem. Does not sleeping in a park and being forced to spend an afternoon sitting next to a dirty guy named Frodo or Bong Water, who smells like patchouli and burnt falafel, make me a part of the 1%?
It’s ok, Occupy Wall Street- don’t get your shorts in a twist. I’m just having a bit of fun at your expense. I really do believe in you, you know. I get what you’re saying, and I’m totally with you, man. Seriously. Frodo and I are behind you 100%.
All wise-assery aside, I really do understand and fully support the Occupy Wall Street movement. It’s high time that Americans wake up and question a system that they help fund that isn’t designed to benefit them in the least. It was really only a matter of time. How long can the income gap widen and corporate losses get bailed out by the taxpayers while the profits remain privatized? How long can American jobs get shipped overseas in the name of profits before someone asks some questions? How long can average, working class Americans take a corporate fist where the sun doesn’t shine before they break?
So the disaffected have taken to the streets. Teeming mobs of angry people that represent the diversity of society, united by the knowledge that the game is rigged. The old and the young. The dark-skinned and the light. Veterans. Retirees. The unemployed. A diverse stew of humanity that defies categorization.
Of course, like any movement, there are the detractors. Unsurprisingly, some have already screeched their disapproval of the OWS movement. Chief amongst them seems to be the tea party. Why, I can’t quite grasp. You’d think that they too would oppose the unholy marriage between government and big business just as much as the lefties. Sadly, that doesn’t appear to be the case. Apparently it’s only government that can oppress us, while corporations are viewed as benevolent behemoths that, if only left to their own devices, would lumber across this great land belching freedom and shitting jobs. Never mind that government, in the not too distant past, had to crank big business’ arms behind their backs and force these same corporations to end child labor practices and actually pay their workers a fair wage. Funny how the tea party way-back machine, in its endless quest for lessons from the past, apparently goes straight back to 1776, and misses quite a few pivotal stops in the 1800’s and early 1900’s.
So I listen to the screeching sturm und drang surrounding OWS, and I scratch my head. I wonder why so many people in America celebrate greed and selfishness. Oh, they wrap it in a flag and call it freedom and liberty. They invoke the invisible hand of almighty capitalism with religious fervor, but make no mistake – at the end of the day it’s straight-up selfishness that sits at the core of many of these movements. Why is it that some Americans will gnash their teeth at the idea of providing their fellow human beings with affordable healthcare, yet they won’t bat an eye at their tax dollars being spent on bloated defense contracts? Why is it patriotic to give subsidies to oil companies – while they churn out billions in profits – yet it’s “Socialist” to use our tax dollars to help a hungry family? Why do so many Americans act like, well, spoiled children?
Here’s my opinion, or the point of this post wherein I make an unusual analogy.
Look at America as a human being. I know, I know - stay with me.
The good ole’ U.S.A. hasn’t been around long. We’re a young nation, and in a lot of ways we’re still trying to find our way. For shits and giggles, let’s contrast the U.S. with Europe. They’ve been around a long time - much longer than we have here across the pond. They’ve had time to hone and perfect and tinker and learn from a pretty vast pool of experiences. Europe, viewed as a human being, is in the throes of middle age. They seem calmer. More content. They possess a wisdom borne of experience and maturity. They’re the person who has emerged into adulthood with the hard-earned knowledge that what matters most is family and friends and love and caring for your fellow man, and that the selfishness of their youth was something to mature beyond, rather than celebrate.
America? We’re a young nation. America is a teenager. We’re petulant, angry and we’re certain beyond a shadow of a doubt that we know every fucking thing there is to know. Sound familiar? We all heard the speech growing up. “You think you know everything right now, but one day you’ll grow up and realize you didn’t know jack-shit.” What happened? We grew up, and we realize that we really didn’t know jack-shit. At the time, though? At the time, we were convinced that we had the whole works figured out, and nobody could tell us otherwise. We were young, cocky and indignant and we were the smartest people on the goddamn block, and fuck you if you insinuated otherwise. If our parents said the sky was blue, we said it wasn’t, for no other reason than to thumb our noses at authority. So if the rest of the world loves soccer, America says it sucks. The rest of the world uses the metric system? Screw that. We’re going in a different direction. Why? Because our way is different and it’s the best, that’s why. No other explanation needed. Extend middle finger into the air and swagger away while you whistle a Toby Keith song.
Do you remember being a teenager? Do you remember what your priorities were, for the most part? That’s right – you. Teenagers are the most self-absorbed and single-minded lot of human beings that walk planet Earth. It’s really not their fault, mind you. I’m not judging or casting aspersions, because we’ve all been there. It’s all biology and chemistry at work on a brain that really hasn’t fully developed yet. When you’re young all that matters is what you want and instant gratification, and everybody and everything else needs to kindly step aside. You want to go to the party at Joe-Blow’s house, but your Mother insists you stay home because you failed chemistry and your bedroom has been declared a Superfund site. Instead of looking at the situation objectively and saying, “Hey, you know what? Maybe she’s right. It is disrespectful to leave such a mess in a house that I live in free of charge, and I really could use some study time to get those grades up”, you instead decide to alternately scream and cry and throw a few things around your room while angrily bemoaning how unfair life is, and continue on to compare your living arrangements to Nazi Germany. (You know, like certain segments of American society compare living under a Democratic president to living in Nazi Germany.) Why do teenagers behave this way? Because they’re immature, and they’re selfish, and they haven’t developed enough yet to start thinking beyond their own immediate needs.
Thus America, at heart a lumbering man-child with nuclear weaponry and a superiority complex, strokes its own ego while lashing out at anything that doesn’t immediately serve its teenage id. Sure the bankers are gaming our political system so that their elite cadre of CEOs can earn obscene amounts of money while simultaneously destroying jobs, the American economy and our own middle class. Sure they are. But they have the right to do it, because CAPITALISM AND EAGLES AND 1776 AND FUCK YOU, THAT’S WHY! Ok, so it isn’t really that simple. But it’s pretty goddamn close. Americans let a lot of evil and heinous shit slide by in this country, because they’ve been convinced that freedom comes without responsibility, and freedom without responsibility is a recipe for selfish, criminal and horribly corrupt behavior. You know, like we’re seeing today. Put another way, if someone told me I had the freedom to walk into an elementary school and shoot plates off children’s heads, I think I’d pass. Why? Because I’d also have the responsibility to ensure that those children weren’t injured, and that’s not a risk I’d be willing to take. I’d bet my bottom dollar, however, that a handful of people would gather outside the school, side arms on display, prattling on about how they should be able to shoot the plates off the heads of as many kids as they want, because CAPITALISM AND EAGLES AND 1776 AND FUCK YOU, THAT’S WHY!
Look, I know this analogy isn’t perfect. I know that not all of Europe has their shit together, and I know that not every American is a selfish prick. I admit that I’m generalizing to make a point. But hey, I call them as I see them, and I’ve seen enough to know that the stereotypes that I’ve laid out here have deep roots in the way things are. I know that America loves guns and war and runs cold on helping the less fortunate and ensuring that their citizenry has access to affordable health care. I also know that in Europe – Hell, in every industrialized nation except our own – you don’t have to worry about dying because you can’t afford a doctor. It comes down to priorities, and the way I see it our priorities favor everyone’s right to make a quick buck over the desire to pool our resources to ensure that the least amongst us are cared for. I won’t apologize for my desire to see my money actually help people, instead of being used to drop bombs in Afghanistan to ensure we have an uninterrupted supply of cell phone batteries for years to come. I envision a better world where unfettered Capitalism isn’t used as a blunt weapon to batter us into hamburger so that a handful of old, white men can keep amassing more wealth than most of us can comprehend. I envision a better world where we care more about our fellow man than we do about the Dow Jones. I envision a world where the people who scream the loudest about the Bible actually read it, and see what it was Jesus had to say about caring for the least of us. I envision a world where our humanity transcends our selfishness and greed. I guess I’m just waiting patiently for America to grow up.
I mean, seriously. Look at me. Sitting here in front of this glowing box, sipping coffee and listening to the Velvet Underground while I tap-tap-tap out a blog post in relative comfort. I think I may be part of the problem. Does not sleeping in a park and being forced to spend an afternoon sitting next to a dirty guy named Frodo or Bong Water, who smells like patchouli and burnt falafel, make me a part of the 1%?
It’s ok, Occupy Wall Street- don’t get your shorts in a twist. I’m just having a bit of fun at your expense. I really do believe in you, you know. I get what you’re saying, and I’m totally with you, man. Seriously. Frodo and I are behind you 100%.
All wise-assery aside, I really do understand and fully support the Occupy Wall Street movement. It’s high time that Americans wake up and question a system that they help fund that isn’t designed to benefit them in the least. It was really only a matter of time. How long can the income gap widen and corporate losses get bailed out by the taxpayers while the profits remain privatized? How long can American jobs get shipped overseas in the name of profits before someone asks some questions? How long can average, working class Americans take a corporate fist where the sun doesn’t shine before they break?
So the disaffected have taken to the streets. Teeming mobs of angry people that represent the diversity of society, united by the knowledge that the game is rigged. The old and the young. The dark-skinned and the light. Veterans. Retirees. The unemployed. A diverse stew of humanity that defies categorization.
Of course, like any movement, there are the detractors. Unsurprisingly, some have already screeched their disapproval of the OWS movement. Chief amongst them seems to be the tea party. Why, I can’t quite grasp. You’d think that they too would oppose the unholy marriage between government and big business just as much as the lefties. Sadly, that doesn’t appear to be the case. Apparently it’s only government that can oppress us, while corporations are viewed as benevolent behemoths that, if only left to their own devices, would lumber across this great land belching freedom and shitting jobs. Never mind that government, in the not too distant past, had to crank big business’ arms behind their backs and force these same corporations to end child labor practices and actually pay their workers a fair wage. Funny how the tea party way-back machine, in its endless quest for lessons from the past, apparently goes straight back to 1776, and misses quite a few pivotal stops in the 1800’s and early 1900’s.
So I listen to the screeching sturm und drang surrounding OWS, and I scratch my head. I wonder why so many people in America celebrate greed and selfishness. Oh, they wrap it in a flag and call it freedom and liberty. They invoke the invisible hand of almighty capitalism with religious fervor, but make no mistake – at the end of the day it’s straight-up selfishness that sits at the core of many of these movements. Why is it that some Americans will gnash their teeth at the idea of providing their fellow human beings with affordable healthcare, yet they won’t bat an eye at their tax dollars being spent on bloated defense contracts? Why is it patriotic to give subsidies to oil companies – while they churn out billions in profits – yet it’s “Socialist” to use our tax dollars to help a hungry family? Why do so many Americans act like, well, spoiled children?
Here’s my opinion, or the point of this post wherein I make an unusual analogy.
Look at America as a human being. I know, I know - stay with me.
The good ole’ U.S.A. hasn’t been around long. We’re a young nation, and in a lot of ways we’re still trying to find our way. For shits and giggles, let’s contrast the U.S. with Europe. They’ve been around a long time - much longer than we have here across the pond. They’ve had time to hone and perfect and tinker and learn from a pretty vast pool of experiences. Europe, viewed as a human being, is in the throes of middle age. They seem calmer. More content. They possess a wisdom borne of experience and maturity. They’re the person who has emerged into adulthood with the hard-earned knowledge that what matters most is family and friends and love and caring for your fellow man, and that the selfishness of their youth was something to mature beyond, rather than celebrate.
America? We’re a young nation. America is a teenager. We’re petulant, angry and we’re certain beyond a shadow of a doubt that we know every fucking thing there is to know. Sound familiar? We all heard the speech growing up. “You think you know everything right now, but one day you’ll grow up and realize you didn’t know jack-shit.” What happened? We grew up, and we realize that we really didn’t know jack-shit. At the time, though? At the time, we were convinced that we had the whole works figured out, and nobody could tell us otherwise. We were young, cocky and indignant and we were the smartest people on the goddamn block, and fuck you if you insinuated otherwise. If our parents said the sky was blue, we said it wasn’t, for no other reason than to thumb our noses at authority. So if the rest of the world loves soccer, America says it sucks. The rest of the world uses the metric system? Screw that. We’re going in a different direction. Why? Because our way is different and it’s the best, that’s why. No other explanation needed. Extend middle finger into the air and swagger away while you whistle a Toby Keith song.
Do you remember being a teenager? Do you remember what your priorities were, for the most part? That’s right – you. Teenagers are the most self-absorbed and single-minded lot of human beings that walk planet Earth. It’s really not their fault, mind you. I’m not judging or casting aspersions, because we’ve all been there. It’s all biology and chemistry at work on a brain that really hasn’t fully developed yet. When you’re young all that matters is what you want and instant gratification, and everybody and everything else needs to kindly step aside. You want to go to the party at Joe-Blow’s house, but your Mother insists you stay home because you failed chemistry and your bedroom has been declared a Superfund site. Instead of looking at the situation objectively and saying, “Hey, you know what? Maybe she’s right. It is disrespectful to leave such a mess in a house that I live in free of charge, and I really could use some study time to get those grades up”, you instead decide to alternately scream and cry and throw a few things around your room while angrily bemoaning how unfair life is, and continue on to compare your living arrangements to Nazi Germany. (You know, like certain segments of American society compare living under a Democratic president to living in Nazi Germany.) Why do teenagers behave this way? Because they’re immature, and they’re selfish, and they haven’t developed enough yet to start thinking beyond their own immediate needs.
Thus America, at heart a lumbering man-child with nuclear weaponry and a superiority complex, strokes its own ego while lashing out at anything that doesn’t immediately serve its teenage id. Sure the bankers are gaming our political system so that their elite cadre of CEOs can earn obscene amounts of money while simultaneously destroying jobs, the American economy and our own middle class. Sure they are. But they have the right to do it, because CAPITALISM AND EAGLES AND 1776 AND FUCK YOU, THAT’S WHY! Ok, so it isn’t really that simple. But it’s pretty goddamn close. Americans let a lot of evil and heinous shit slide by in this country, because they’ve been convinced that freedom comes without responsibility, and freedom without responsibility is a recipe for selfish, criminal and horribly corrupt behavior. You know, like we’re seeing today. Put another way, if someone told me I had the freedom to walk into an elementary school and shoot plates off children’s heads, I think I’d pass. Why? Because I’d also have the responsibility to ensure that those children weren’t injured, and that’s not a risk I’d be willing to take. I’d bet my bottom dollar, however, that a handful of people would gather outside the school, side arms on display, prattling on about how they should be able to shoot the plates off the heads of as many kids as they want, because CAPITALISM AND EAGLES AND 1776 AND FUCK YOU, THAT’S WHY!
Look, I know this analogy isn’t perfect. I know that not all of Europe has their shit together, and I know that not every American is a selfish prick. I admit that I’m generalizing to make a point. But hey, I call them as I see them, and I’ve seen enough to know that the stereotypes that I’ve laid out here have deep roots in the way things are. I know that America loves guns and war and runs cold on helping the less fortunate and ensuring that their citizenry has access to affordable health care. I also know that in Europe – Hell, in every industrialized nation except our own – you don’t have to worry about dying because you can’t afford a doctor. It comes down to priorities, and the way I see it our priorities favor everyone’s right to make a quick buck over the desire to pool our resources to ensure that the least amongst us are cared for. I won’t apologize for my desire to see my money actually help people, instead of being used to drop bombs in Afghanistan to ensure we have an uninterrupted supply of cell phone batteries for years to come. I envision a better world where unfettered Capitalism isn’t used as a blunt weapon to batter us into hamburger so that a handful of old, white men can keep amassing more wealth than most of us can comprehend. I envision a better world where we care more about our fellow man than we do about the Dow Jones. I envision a world where the people who scream the loudest about the Bible actually read it, and see what it was Jesus had to say about caring for the least of us. I envision a world where our humanity transcends our selfishness and greed. I guess I’m just waiting patiently for America to grow up.
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